yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
