i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize