There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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