Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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