Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
