I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
