Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
