the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Who died my cat blue again?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
