i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
