I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Randomize
