Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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