dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
be right there i have to get my cape
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize