break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
