you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
