she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
