She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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