He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
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