Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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