So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
You were trust falling into bushes
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
