she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize