the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize