I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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