Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
