Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
