Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize