did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
