is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
