yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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