He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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