no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
