I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
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