Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I touched a dick in church today
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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