wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Randomize
