You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Mom said you looked used
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
