in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
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