Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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