so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
