Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
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