I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
