shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
