my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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