Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
