So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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