I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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