Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
