It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
