Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
