Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
