Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
