got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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