I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
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