Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
