i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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